I was flipping last night and saw that the Washington Nationals' home opener was on. Then I saw that the President of the USA (my friend!) was to throw out the first pitch. I was on the verge of switching stations, when I had this thought: "Maybe he will get booed."
So I watched. And yes he did. It was very satisfying.
Poor simpleton. He has so little direct feedback from "the people" that his little head must've been spinning. "Some folks don't like me? Why? Waaaahhh" he must've thought. Then he had a nap to rest after all that thinkin'.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Milk
Our cafeteria has run out of 2% milk. At home, I drink 1%, but at work the choices are 2% or skim. So for now I have to drink skim.
God it's foul.
I hated it as a kid, but thought that now that I am older and wiser, and maybe my taste buds are fading, it wouldn't be so bad.
But it's still horrible. Yuck.
God it's foul.
I hated it as a kid, but thought that now that I am older and wiser, and maybe my taste buds are fading, it wouldn't be so bad.
But it's still horrible. Yuck.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
It's not easy being old
We've finally got a decent day, and I remain house-bound nursing my sprained ankle.
Life is an unending series of let-downs!
I'm sure the ankle will be sturdy enough to make it back to work tomorrow. Oh hurray.
I now realize that when I fell on Thursday, I should've gone straight back in the house, put an ice pack on it immediately, and done all the resting, elevating biz as quickly as possible. Instead, I just shook it off figuring it was no big deal. Idiot. Live and learn.
Life is an unending series of let-downs!
I'm sure the ankle will be sturdy enough to make it back to work tomorrow. Oh hurray.
I now realize that when I fell on Thursday, I should've gone straight back in the house, put an ice pack on it immediately, and done all the resting, elevating biz as quickly as possible. Instead, I just shook it off figuring it was no big deal. Idiot. Live and learn.
Canadian Tire Money
I went to wikipedia, and lo and behold, they have an entry for Canadian Tire Money.
They claim the old guy on the bills is a fictional character named Sandy McTire. Who named him? And why?
They claim the old guy on the bills is a fictional character named Sandy McTire. Who named him? And why?
Friday, March 28, 2008
The Name Game: Ungorgeous George
BBC reports on a study of perceived successful and unsuccesful names.
The winners:
Most successful: Elizabeth and James
Luckiest: Lucy and Jack
Most attractive: Sophie and Ryan
The losers:
Least successful: Lisa and Brian
Least lucky: Helen and John
Least attractive: Ann and George
Poor Mr. Clooney. If only he'd been given an attractive name. He might've had some success with the ladies.
Also, why don't all those unlucky guys named John just start calling themselves Jack? It's the same name.
The winners:
Most successful: Elizabeth and James
Luckiest: Lucy and Jack
Most attractive: Sophie and Ryan
The losers:
Least successful: Lisa and Brian
Least lucky: Helen and John
Least attractive: Ann and George
Poor Mr. Clooney. If only he'd been given an attractive name. He might've had some success with the ladies.
Also, why don't all those unlucky guys named John just start calling themselves Jack? It's the same name.
Earth Hour = Crock of Shit
More than 55,000 people and 150 communities across Canada have leapt on board, pledging to turn off or dim their lights from 8 p.m. to 9 p.m. local times Saturday in a show of conservationist solidarity. (The Globe & Mail)
One whole hour. Ooooh!
One whole hour. Ooooh!
Canadian Icons go pffffft
Maybe I’m just looking for headlines to get depressed about, but today’s news is making me feel like a dinosaur. These two headlines in particular:
CBC Radio Orchestra to disband after 70 years.
Sigh. Culture is deader than Dillinger.
After 80 years, Canadian Tire stops publishing catalogues
I can’t remember not having a Canadian Tire catalogue in the house. It was something to thumb through as a kid. I was always impressed by the weird fishing gear, like hip waders. And camping stuff. We didn’t camp, as my father was anti-sleeping-on-the-ground ("I slept on the ground for 5 years during the War. Never again"), so I used to look at the different tents in the Canadian Tire catalogue, and read “sleeps two”, “sleeps four” or wow “sleeps six”. That’s a big tent.
Another depressing story: Tainted mozzarella from Italy. If you can’t trust Italian cheese, what can you trust?
CBC Radio Orchestra to disband after 70 years.
Sigh. Culture is deader than Dillinger.
After 80 years, Canadian Tire stops publishing catalogues
I can’t remember not having a Canadian Tire catalogue in the house. It was something to thumb through as a kid. I was always impressed by the weird fishing gear, like hip waders. And camping stuff. We didn’t camp, as my father was anti-sleeping-on-the-ground ("I slept on the ground for 5 years during the War. Never again"), so I used to look at the different tents in the Canadian Tire catalogue, and read “sleeps two”, “sleeps four” or wow “sleeps six”. That’s a big tent.
Another depressing story: Tainted mozzarella from Italy. If you can’t trust Italian cheese, what can you trust?
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Another reason to love Scotland
I usually don’t need to reprint an entire article to enjoy a laugh, but there are so many great one-liners here, I don’t know where to cut. (From BBC News)
A 58-year-old man who fed pigeons wearing only a skimpy thong which was back to front has been fined £150.
Neighbours spotted David Batchelor in his street in Perth in the underwear which left his genitals partly exposed.
Perth Sheriff Court heard that children walking home from school had been passing by at the time.
His lawyer said that Batchelor had been drunk and there was no sexual element to the way he had behaved. He admitted committing a breach of the peace.
When officers had turned up to investigate they found Batchelor still partially dressed and with his flimsy thong on the wrong way round.
At the court previously, Fiscal Depute Hannah Kennedy said: "The witnesses watched as the accused walked between the common close entrance and the pavement. He went behind some bushes outside his house.
"There were a large number of schoolchildren passing his home address at this stage.
"He returned to his flat then reappeared still wearing this item.
"It was still exposing his genitalia. The witnesses were alarmed by his actions and concerned for the children who had passed."
Batchelor claimed he had not seen anyone around, but then confessed he looked at everyone as they went past and the "schoolgirls were bonnie."
Mrs Kennedy added: "Asked why he did it, he replied 'I don't know. I was just feeding the birds and if I was wanting to do that I would just go down town and get a whore'."
Sheriff Michael Fletcher said: "The alcohol seems to be at the root of the problem and nothing much can be done about that, given his attitude towards it."
A 58-year-old man who fed pigeons wearing only a skimpy thong which was back to front has been fined £150.
Neighbours spotted David Batchelor in his street in Perth in the underwear which left his genitals partly exposed.
Perth Sheriff Court heard that children walking home from school had been passing by at the time.
His lawyer said that Batchelor had been drunk and there was no sexual element to the way he had behaved. He admitted committing a breach of the peace.
When officers had turned up to investigate they found Batchelor still partially dressed and with his flimsy thong on the wrong way round.
At the court previously, Fiscal Depute Hannah Kennedy said: "The witnesses watched as the accused walked between the common close entrance and the pavement. He went behind some bushes outside his house.
"There were a large number of schoolchildren passing his home address at this stage.
"He returned to his flat then reappeared still wearing this item.
"It was still exposing his genitalia. The witnesses were alarmed by his actions and concerned for the children who had passed."
Batchelor claimed he had not seen anyone around, but then confessed he looked at everyone as they went past and the "schoolgirls were bonnie."
Mrs Kennedy added: "Asked why he did it, he replied 'I don't know. I was just feeding the birds and if I was wanting to do that I would just go down town and get a whore'."
Sheriff Michael Fletcher said: "The alcohol seems to be at the root of the problem and nothing much can be done about that, given his attitude towards it."
Legends of the Fall
Sometimes I hates my own laziness.
There's a big patch of ice at the foot of my porch. Over a week ago, I took out the salt and planned (oh, some day) to spread salt over the ice to help the thaw along. But did I do that? No.
So this a.m. I'm hauling out my garbage bag and zoooom out go my feet from under me and SPLAT down I go.
My left leg twisted like a fusilli. My ankle is effing throbbing now. It feels like a corkscrew.
On the bright side, I still have a lot of post-op pain killers at home. So this evening I might just down a few of those babies and see what happens. And if it still hurts in the morning, well, I might just have to stay home and rest it, ice it and elevate it.
There's a big patch of ice at the foot of my porch. Over a week ago, I took out the salt and planned (oh, some day) to spread salt over the ice to help the thaw along. But did I do that? No.
So this a.m. I'm hauling out my garbage bag and zoooom out go my feet from under me and SPLAT down I go.
My left leg twisted like a fusilli. My ankle is effing throbbing now. It feels like a corkscrew.
On the bright side, I still have a lot of post-op pain killers at home. So this evening I might just down a few of those babies and see what happens. And if it still hurts in the morning, well, I might just have to stay home and rest it, ice it and elevate it.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Coincidence?
The weather's been okay for the past 2 days, and I find myself with nothing to blog about.
This would imply that if it were not for bad weather I would have nothing else to talk about. How dull is that?
Is it me, or is there nothing of interest going on these days? I should join Boreds Anonymous.
I don't even have any work-related bathroom antics to analyze.
Sure, I could write about Patrick Roy & Son. But that can be summed up in a couple of words: Idiots pere et fils. yawn.
I could say something about Tibet. But the only thing I can think of is that I wish Western people would stop treating the Dalai Lama like he's a cool prop. He's not our toy.
Hillary's apparently a big liar, and Barack's at the beach this week. McCain remains a crazy old geezer.
Some Liberals want to get rid of Stephane Dion. Politics is an ugly nasty business. Why does anyone want to be in it. I confess the more I see of Iggy in Parliament, the more I like him. That's a 180 for me. I think he's the future leader of the Libs.
Kids in Quebec can't speak or write French properly. This is disturbing.
When is the snow going to seriously start melting? I'm depressed about it.
This would imply that if it were not for bad weather I would have nothing else to talk about. How dull is that?
Is it me, or is there nothing of interest going on these days? I should join Boreds Anonymous.
I don't even have any work-related bathroom antics to analyze.
Sure, I could write about Patrick Roy & Son. But that can be summed up in a couple of words: Idiots pere et fils. yawn.
I could say something about Tibet. But the only thing I can think of is that I wish Western people would stop treating the Dalai Lama like he's a cool prop. He's not our toy.
Hillary's apparently a big liar, and Barack's at the beach this week. McCain remains a crazy old geezer.
Some Liberals want to get rid of Stephane Dion. Politics is an ugly nasty business. Why does anyone want to be in it. I confess the more I see of Iggy in Parliament, the more I like him. That's a 180 for me. I think he's the future leader of the Libs.
Kids in Quebec can't speak or write French properly. This is disturbing.
When is the snow going to seriously start melting? I'm depressed about it.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
The Non-Easter
Easter this year was too early, too cold and too snow-bound to feel like Easter.
Now the 4-day weekend is finished, a cold April looms, and there's not much to look forward to.
Bleh!
Now the 4-day weekend is finished, a cold April looms, and there's not much to look forward to.
Bleh!
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Sneaky McDump sighting
I have established that Mr. McDump works on the floor below mine.
The elevators doors opened on that floor, and there he stood in all his sneaky glory.
The elevators doors opened on that floor, and there he stood in all his sneaky glory.
The Bathroom Thief (No. 2 in a series, heh)
JAW Fan has kindly submitted a list of possible names for the mysterious bathroom man. I'm leaning towards Sneaky McDump.
Any favourites here?
El Noisy
The Poopster
Sneaky McDump
Blastoff Barnie
The Scarlet Poopernickle
Farty Fred
Sh*t-Shy Charlie
Crapola Johnson
Any favourites here?
El Noisy
The Poopster
Sneaky McDump
Blastoff Barnie
The Scarlet Poopernickle
Farty Fred
Sh*t-Shy Charlie
Crapola Johnson
Long weekend on the horizon...
My boss has a weird quirk. She never lets us know when she is going to take a day off.
I like and appreciate my boss, but I don't know why a day's vacation is always a secret. This habit is both good and bad: Bad in that if I had something urgent to discuss with her today, I would be left hanging because I didn't know she wouldn't be in. Good because when I was told she wasn't here today, I thought, whooo, long weekend starts now! Just how much work am I going to do today? Answer: Not much.
In my defense, I will be having one meeting today with a very difficult person. That being said, are those 10 to 15 minutes really justifying a full-day's pay? Probably not. But at least I'll be doing something unpleasant so I'm not a total time-waster.
And I'll probably do a bit of regular work. Fortunately, I'm back on my counterfeiting and forgery task, so that it always fun.
I like and appreciate my boss, but I don't know why a day's vacation is always a secret. This habit is both good and bad: Bad in that if I had something urgent to discuss with her today, I would be left hanging because I didn't know she wouldn't be in. Good because when I was told she wasn't here today, I thought, whooo, long weekend starts now! Just how much work am I going to do today? Answer: Not much.
In my defense, I will be having one meeting today with a very difficult person. That being said, are those 10 to 15 minutes really justifying a full-day's pay? Probably not. But at least I'll be doing something unpleasant so I'm not a total time-waster.
And I'll probably do a bit of regular work. Fortunately, I'm back on my counterfeiting and forgery task, so that it always fun.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Remaining Current on Currency
I got a $10 bill today.
The quotation on it is the first stanza of In Flanders Fields.
I love that poem. Canadian money is cool.
The quotation on it is the first stanza of In Flanders Fields.
I love that poem. Canadian money is cool.
Office Intrigue
Forget about my career in forgery, I should've been a spy.
For the past two weeks or so, a man from another floor uses the men’s room on our floor. I see him come out of the stairwell, go into the men’s room whose door is right beside the stairs, and when he leaves he goes back out into the stairwell.
I recognize him vaguely as someone who has worked here for a while, but I don’t know which department he is in. Or which floor he works on. I assume it's the floor either directly above or below ours. I can’t see why he would climb two flights or more to use a bathroom.
But why do this at all? Why can’t he use the can on his own floor? Any ideas?
This is really bugging me. I mentioned it to my colleague this morning and all she did was laugh, but now she’s curious and wants to see the guy too.
Also, I need a nickname for this character. I've been calling him The Bathroom Thief, but that isn't really accurate. Suggestions?
For the past two weeks or so, a man from another floor uses the men’s room on our floor. I see him come out of the stairwell, go into the men’s room whose door is right beside the stairs, and when he leaves he goes back out into the stairwell.
I recognize him vaguely as someone who has worked here for a while, but I don’t know which department he is in. Or which floor he works on. I assume it's the floor either directly above or below ours. I can’t see why he would climb two flights or more to use a bathroom.
But why do this at all? Why can’t he use the can on his own floor? Any ideas?
This is really bugging me. I mentioned it to my colleague this morning and all she did was laugh, but now she’s curious and wants to see the guy too.
Also, I need a nickname for this character. I've been calling him The Bathroom Thief, but that isn't really accurate. Suggestions?
Rain, Rain, Hurray, Hurray
After 4 solid months of bitching about snow, I'm happy to report that it is raining today.
The Weather Office web site, however, seems to be hedging its bets. It has a funny warning that maybe things could still maybe change back to snow. It feels like a "Don't Blame Us" kinda warning.
I suspect that is to protect themselves because if the rain should turn to snow, angry Montrealers will storm the Environment Canada offices bearing torches and pitchforks, for sure. I'll be there.
Next problem: How many days of mild weather before my basement is full of water? There's a lot of melting to be done.
The Weather Office web site, however, seems to be hedging its bets. It has a funny warning that maybe things could still maybe change back to snow. It feels like a "Don't Blame Us" kinda warning.
I suspect that is to protect themselves because if the rain should turn to snow, angry Montrealers will storm the Environment Canada offices bearing torches and pitchforks, for sure. I'll be there.
Next problem: How many days of mild weather before my basement is full of water? There's a lot of melting to be done.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
31 July 2008, New Jersey
Tickets to see Bruce at Giants Stadium are now in my hot lil hands. I can't believe I've got them already. I keep looking at them and thinking how weird this is.
My sis is beside herself. I swear she's a bigger fanatic than I am. How is this even possible?
My sis is beside herself. I swear she's a bigger fanatic than I am. How is this even possible?
Dead Director News
Anthony Minghella died after a "routine" operation. Yikes. RIP.
I guess I should watch The English Patient in his honour tonight.
It is an awfully long movie, though. I think I'll just watch the scenes where Rafe is dashing, tanned and handsome, and skip over all the Rafe-burnt-to-a-crisp bits.
I guess I should watch The English Patient in his honour tonight.
It is an awfully long movie, though. I think I'll just watch the scenes where Rafe is dashing, tanned and handsome, and skip over all the Rafe-burnt-to-a-crisp bits.
You can call me a blind dumb ass
but it is only half an hour ago that I saw there is a lovely quote about the arts on our $20 bill.
I blame this on the fact that it is in 2-point font, and at 47 the old eyes aren't what they used to be.
But, seriously, did everyone but me know there's a quote from Gabrielle Roy on the $20? Knowing how much I cherish my $$$ you'd think I'd be looking at it more closely.
It says:
Nous connaîtrions-nous seulement un peu nous-mêmes sans les arts? / Could we ever know each other in the slightest without the arts?
That's nice.
The $5 has a quote from Roch Carrier about winter and skating rinks. I dunno what's on the $10 because I don't currently have one in my wallet. And the $100? Don't ask me. Really. Don't bother.
I blame this on the fact that it is in 2-point font, and at 47 the old eyes aren't what they used to be.
But, seriously, did everyone but me know there's a quote from Gabrielle Roy on the $20? Knowing how much I cherish my $$$ you'd think I'd be looking at it more closely.
It says:
Nous connaîtrions-nous seulement un peu nous-mêmes sans les arts? / Could we ever know each other in the slightest without the arts?
That's nice.
The $5 has a quote from Roch Carrier about winter and skating rinks. I dunno what's on the $10 because I don't currently have one in my wallet. And the $100? Don't ask me. Really. Don't bother.
Fools on Parade*
This morning at the corner of Peel and St. Antoine there was a cop ticketing dumbos for blocking the intersection. My bus goes through this notorious spot every morning, and every morning there are idiots who think they can sneak across Peel, but can’t and end up gridlocking the whole joint.
So the cop pointed to a grey van, and indicated repeatedly that the van pull over. Then he pointed to a car behind the van to also pull over. Which the car did. But the van’s driver refused and just stayed in his lane crawling towards the next light.
If you think your morning is starting badly because you’re getting a gridlock ticket, do you think it’s being made better by ignoring the cop who’s trying to ticket you? I wonder what the fine is for deliberately ignoring a cop. Could you be arrested for that?
An argument could be made that the cop looked around 15 years old, but I don’t think that’s much of a defence. Your honour, I thought he was just a kid with a shiny vest that said “Police”. I didn’t think he was real.
The van just continued in its lane while the cop wrote down the license plate number. This is gonna cost a lot more than the other guy’s dumb-ass gridlock ticket.
*This is one of my father's expressions. Which I had totally forgotten about until the very instant I typed it.
So the cop pointed to a grey van, and indicated repeatedly that the van pull over. Then he pointed to a car behind the van to also pull over. Which the car did. But the van’s driver refused and just stayed in his lane crawling towards the next light.
If you think your morning is starting badly because you’re getting a gridlock ticket, do you think it’s being made better by ignoring the cop who’s trying to ticket you? I wonder what the fine is for deliberately ignoring a cop. Could you be arrested for that?
An argument could be made that the cop looked around 15 years old, but I don’t think that’s much of a defence. Your honour, I thought he was just a kid with a shiny vest that said “Police”. I didn’t think he was real.
The van just continued in its lane while the cop wrote down the license plate number. This is gonna cost a lot more than the other guy’s dumb-ass gridlock ticket.
*This is one of my father's expressions. Which I had totally forgotten about until the very instant I typed it.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Fraud! Fakery! I love it!
If you had to be a career criminal, which life of crime would you choose?
I ask this because I saw The Counterfeiters over the weekend and really enjoyed it. It’s about Jewish concentration camp prisoners who printed fake currency for the Nazis. Why did I enjoy it so much? Because I love forgery and counterfeiting.
If I had to live my life over as a criminal, I would be a counterfeiter. I love the challenge and the skill of it. You have to be a true artist. It appeals to me. The satisfaction of producing an undetectable fake.
It would be a very satisfying crime to execute successfully. A good counterfeiter has to look on his work with pride. You need to be a perfectionist. But don’t boast about it.
Early in the movie, we see the main protagonist, putting together a fake Argentinean passport, and I was just so excited to watch the photo substitution. I think the 1930s were a golden age of passport fraud. It used to be so easy to do.
I liked Catch Me If You Can for the same reasons. I love fraudsters.
Over the pass couple weeks, I’ve been working (legitimately) on some documentation about passport fraud. (In short: we’re against it!!) I get such a kick reading about stuff like photochromic ink and intaglio printing. I read it all and think: Oooh, I want to do this! Somehow, I don’t think that’s the goal of the documentation.
I ask this because I saw The Counterfeiters over the weekend and really enjoyed it. It’s about Jewish concentration camp prisoners who printed fake currency for the Nazis. Why did I enjoy it so much? Because I love forgery and counterfeiting.
If I had to live my life over as a criminal, I would be a counterfeiter. I love the challenge and the skill of it. You have to be a true artist. It appeals to me. The satisfaction of producing an undetectable fake.
It would be a very satisfying crime to execute successfully. A good counterfeiter has to look on his work with pride. You need to be a perfectionist. But don’t boast about it.
Early in the movie, we see the main protagonist, putting together a fake Argentinean passport, and I was just so excited to watch the photo substitution. I think the 1930s were a golden age of passport fraud. It used to be so easy to do.
I liked Catch Me If You Can for the same reasons. I love fraudsters.
Over the pass couple weeks, I’ve been working (legitimately) on some documentation about passport fraud. (In short: we’re against it!!) I get such a kick reading about stuff like photochromic ink and intaglio printing. I read it all and think: Oooh, I want to do this! Somehow, I don’t think that’s the goal of the documentation.
Economics II
This would be funny if it wasn't so scary.
Markets have been tanking, and the Fed has to pump $30 billion into a PRIVATE company to keep it afloat. So what's the solution.
Bush makes a statement, telling us everything is under control.
Now we know the trouble is real.
Is there anyone on Earth who is less trusted? Anyone whose word means less? Isn't he the last person on the planet to be believed about anything, anything at all? He's told nothing but lies for 7 years and now people are supposed to relax because HE said things were okay. I'm smacking myself on the forehead.
Markets have been tanking, and the Fed has to pump $30 billion into a PRIVATE company to keep it afloat. So what's the solution.
Bush makes a statement, telling us everything is under control.
Now we know the trouble is real.
Is there anyone on Earth who is less trusted? Anyone whose word means less? Isn't he the last person on the planet to be believed about anything, anything at all? He's told nothing but lies for 7 years and now people are supposed to relax because HE said things were okay. I'm smacking myself on the forehead.
In Economic News
Why aren't we jumping out the windows yet? From the Independent:
One UK economist warned that the world is now close to a 1930s-like Great Depression, while New York traders said they had never experienced such fear.
A trader in New York said: "Everyone is in a total state of shock, aghast at what is happening. No one wants to talk, let alone deal; we're just standing by waiting. Everyone is nervous about what is going to emerge when trading starts tomorrow."
In the UK, a senior market strategist said on Friday night: "We have all been talking about a 1970s-style crisis but as each day goes by this looks more like the 1930s. No one has any clue as to where this is going to end; it's a self-feeding disaster."
Am I the only one who feels like the world is merrily sailing into a complete disaster and we're all totally oblivious? A huge investment bank that had its shares at $30 a piece last Monday was just "rescued" for $2 a share. What the f***? This is not comforting.
Eating chips is the only solution. Pringles. By the can. Don't stop until the can is empty.
Then open another can.
One UK economist warned that the world is now close to a 1930s-like Great Depression, while New York traders said they had never experienced such fear.
A trader in New York said: "Everyone is in a total state of shock, aghast at what is happening. No one wants to talk, let alone deal; we're just standing by waiting. Everyone is nervous about what is going to emerge when trading starts tomorrow."
In the UK, a senior market strategist said on Friday night: "We have all been talking about a 1970s-style crisis but as each day goes by this looks more like the 1930s. No one has any clue as to where this is going to end; it's a self-feeding disaster."
Am I the only one who feels like the world is merrily sailing into a complete disaster and we're all totally oblivious? A huge investment bank that had its shares at $30 a piece last Monday was just "rescued" for $2 a share. What the f***? This is not comforting.
Eating chips is the only solution. Pringles. By the can. Don't stop until the can is empty.
Then open another can.
5 down, 95 to go
It's the 5th anniversary of the start of the Iraq War.
WW2 must've gone by like a breeze compared to this.
I love the word quagmire. It's one of my fave words.
WW2 must've gone by like a breeze compared to this.
I love the word quagmire. It's one of my fave words.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Chips!
The first time I set foot in Saratoga Springs, New York, a weird sensation told me that this must be my spiritual home. And today I learned why.
Potato chips were invented there. In 1853. One would think 1853 would be in the history books like 1066 or 1776. But no. How wrong this is.
CBS Sunday Morning had a feature all about chips today. It directed me to this great web site: taquitos.net where they review all kinds of snack foods. These are people after my own heart.
http://www.taquitos.net/snacks.php?page_code=6
Potato chips were invented there. In 1853. One would think 1853 would be in the history books like 1066 or 1776. But no. How wrong this is.
CBS Sunday Morning had a feature all about chips today. It directed me to this great web site: taquitos.net where they review all kinds of snack foods. These are people after my own heart.
http://www.taquitos.net/snacks.php?page_code=6
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Cutest thing in the entire world
There is nothing cuter than this. Really.
In a year's time she'll be able to kill you with one swipe of her claws. But for now, Awwwww!
In a year's time she'll be able to kill you with one swipe of her claws. But for now, Awwwww!
Friday, March 14, 2008
Poor Newfoundland
They really got socked yesterday. 50 cm! And some people are living my nightmare. Being stranded at work.
Being stuck at home I can deal with, but the thought of being stuck at work overnight is really not fun.
A cab driver told me yesterday we're supposed to get another storm, 30 cm, next week. I hate cab-driving doomsayers.
Being stuck at home I can deal with, but the thought of being stuck at work overnight is really not fun.
A cab driver told me yesterday we're supposed to get another storm, 30 cm, next week. I hate cab-driving doomsayers.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Lies, All Lies
This is the most absurd thing I have ever read in my life. From yesterday's NY Times:
"Based on national averages, a 40-year-old woman should be able to do 16 push-ups and a man the same age should be able to do 27. By the age of 60, those numbers drop to 17 for men and 6 for women. Those numbers are just slightly less than what is required of Army soldiers who are subjected to regular push-up tests."
"National averages" are "just slightly less" than what the Army requires? In what alien land of fitness is this?
I was discussing this with a friend who is 52 and by my standards, she is insanely, ridiculously fit. She said she can do 6 push-ups, which puts her in the category of a 60-year-old woman in the NY Times' crazy la-la land.
These are real push-ups, not those on-your-knees girly push-ups. I don't know any woman (well, maybe one) who can do 16 real ones. And, guys I know, I'd venture that none of you can do 27. Anyone care to prove me wrong?
"Based on national averages, a 40-year-old woman should be able to do 16 push-ups and a man the same age should be able to do 27. By the age of 60, those numbers drop to 17 for men and 6 for women. Those numbers are just slightly less than what is required of Army soldiers who are subjected to regular push-up tests."
"National averages" are "just slightly less" than what the Army requires? In what alien land of fitness is this?
I was discussing this with a friend who is 52 and by my standards, she is insanely, ridiculously fit. She said she can do 6 push-ups, which puts her in the category of a 60-year-old woman in the NY Times' crazy la-la land.
These are real push-ups, not those on-your-knees girly push-ups. I don't know any woman (well, maybe one) who can do 16 real ones. And, guys I know, I'd venture that none of you can do 27. Anyone care to prove me wrong?
Patience is rewarded
Almost 90 minutes of plunking away at the Refresh key, but I finally got through to buy a Leonard Cohen ticket. Quel ordeal.
Anyway, I got a seat in the 21st row which I think is pretty good. It's on the third night, so I hope he hasn't exhausted himself by then...
Anyway, I got a seat in the 21st row which I think is pretty good. It's on the third night, so I hope he hasn't exhausted himself by then...
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
A Nation of JAW Fans
MONTREAL — In Montreal, a man pulled a toy gun in a dispute over a parking spot on a snow-clogged street. In Quebec City, a resident allegedly pulled out a real shotgun after a neighbour's snow was blown onto his lawn.
This winter, some people appear to be reaching their psychological tipping point. Police and professionals describe it as snow rage. (Globe & Mail)
Is anyone surprised?
This winter, some people appear to be reaching their psychological tipping point. Police and professionals describe it as snow rage. (Globe & Mail)
Is anyone surprised?
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Spitzer, Part Two
The more I read about this Spitzer investigation, the more I’m convinced the guy’s an idiot. Quote: suspicious financial transactions reported to them (the investigators) by banks found several unusual movements of cash involving the governor of New York.
He’s using money from his office? Traceable money from his office? What a maroon.
Why didn’t he just hire cheaper hookers and pay cash?
I know it didn’t work for Hugh Grant, but still.
If this was just a hooker thing, and not a money thing, I would let him off the hook. Let the wrath (and lawyers) of his wife come down on his head. That would be enough.
Also, if I was the wife of some high-profile dumb ass who got caught in this situation, there is no way in Hell I’d be meekly standing by my man at the press conference, looking all wifey and supportive. I’d tell him to go out there and face the press all by his lonesome dumb ass self. Then I’d hold a separate news conference just to ask: Can you believe what a dumb ass my husband is?
He’s using money from his office? Traceable money from his office? What a maroon.
Why didn’t he just hire cheaper hookers and pay cash?
I know it didn’t work for Hugh Grant, but still.
If this was just a hooker thing, and not a money thing, I would let him off the hook. Let the wrath (and lawyers) of his wife come down on his head. That would be enough.
Also, if I was the wife of some high-profile dumb ass who got caught in this situation, there is no way in Hell I’d be meekly standing by my man at the press conference, looking all wifey and supportive. I’d tell him to go out there and face the press all by his lonesome dumb ass self. Then I’d hold a separate news conference just to ask: Can you believe what a dumb ass my husband is?
Lenny, Baby
Finally, a chance to see Leonard Cohen. Tickets go on sale on Thursday. My fingers shall be poised over the keyboard, credit card at the ready.
I've liked Lenny since I was about 15 and borrowed his records from, of all places, our high school library! Let's never say that nothing cool was ever discovered at CVR!
I've liked Lenny since I was about 15 and borrowed his records from, of all places, our high school library! Let's never say that nothing cool was ever discovered at CVR!
Monday, March 10, 2008
US Politics
I guess the big scandal in the USA today is that the Governor of New York State has been caught doing bidness with a prostitution ring.
My first thought was: What? But he's a Democrat!
I suppose if he was a Republican it would've been a teenage boy prostitution ring.
I've always thought Spitzer was okay. I don't think it's a big deal. Just makes him more of a Kennedy-type Democrat. Mayor Quimby would understand.
If that creepy senator from Louisiana can visit hookers and wear diapers while doing so, and keep his job, this Spitzer thing should not even be a front-page story.
My first thought was: What? But he's a Democrat!
I suppose if he was a Republican it would've been a teenage boy prostitution ring.
I've always thought Spitzer was okay. I don't think it's a big deal. Just makes him more of a Kennedy-type Democrat. Mayor Quimby would understand.
If that creepy senator from Louisiana can visit hookers and wear diapers while doing so, and keep his job, this Spitzer thing should not even be a front-page story.
In Hair News
Nobody at the office has noticed my new coiffure!
I feel like Alice Cramden.
My neurotic insecure self is thinking everyone HAS noticed, and they are all being polite and saying nothing because they hate it. But I'm sure the truth is it actually doesn't show much and nobody's paying the slightest attention.
Wallflower. :(
I feel like Alice Cramden.
My neurotic insecure self is thinking everyone HAS noticed, and they are all being polite and saying nothing because they hate it. But I'm sure the truth is it actually doesn't show much and nobody's paying the slightest attention.
Wallflower. :(
Mmmm
I just had bacon for the first time in two months.
mmmm. salty.
I almost regret having it, because now I just want more.
Why do the most unhealthly foods have to taste the best?
mmmm. salty.
I almost regret having it, because now I just want more.
Why do the most unhealthly foods have to taste the best?
Sunday, March 09, 2008
I Dare You
I dare anyone to use the phrase " winter wonderland" in my presence.
Go ahead.
I dare ya. Just try it.
Go ahead.
I dare ya. Just try it.
The Morning After
Well, that was pretty awful.
When the city bus drivers abandon their vehicles, you gotta figure nobody's going anywhere.
I did a fair amount of digging out yesterday, but I'm heading out to finish the job now. sigh.
Yesterday, between snowfalls, I did what most people do in these situations. Went to the "beauty parlour" and had red highlights put in my hair. Why? To combat depression. I'm hoping this is less addictive than booze.
I told my hairdresser "I'm only here because of the weather." His response: "Let it snow! Let it snow!" Heh. One of his better ones.
When the city bus drivers abandon their vehicles, you gotta figure nobody's going anywhere.
I did a fair amount of digging out yesterday, but I'm heading out to finish the job now. sigh.
Yesterday, between snowfalls, I did what most people do in these situations. Went to the "beauty parlour" and had red highlights put in my hair. Why? To combat depression. I'm hoping this is less addictive than booze.
I told my hairdresser "I'm only here because of the weather." His response: "Let it snow! Let it snow!" Heh. One of his better ones.
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Dames!
It's March 8, or as Frank Sinatra might've called it: International Broads' Day.
Best regards to all the chicks out there.
Best regards to all the chicks out there.
Friday, March 07, 2008
Cheeseburger, Cheeseburger
Six-and-a-half weeks after surgery I had my first cheeseburger today. It was a small one, the $1.39 burger at McD's, but it was so tasty. yum.
There are only two things left on my uneaten list: pizza and peanut butter.
I think I'll try both of them this weekend (not together) with my Emergency Snowstorm Survivalist Wine.
Pizza and wine? Good. Peanut butter and wine? Maybe not so good.
There are only two things left on my uneaten list: pizza and peanut butter.
I think I'll try both of them this weekend (not together) with my Emergency Snowstorm Survivalist Wine.
Pizza and wine? Good. Peanut butter and wine? Maybe not so good.
Two storms a-comin'
Two, count 'em, two snowfalls forecast for the weekend. But fear not! I'm ready. I bought red wine last night and plan to drink myself through the storms! Cheers!
I'm a bit concerned as to when the Anonymous family are returning from Florida. They've got to land in Vermont (snowy, no doubt) and then drive a couple of hours back to Montreal. I hope they land between the snows.
I'm a bit concerned as to when the Anonymous family are returning from Florida. They've got to land in Vermont (snowy, no doubt) and then drive a couple of hours back to Montreal. I hope they land between the snows.
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Surprise! Another post about the freakin' weather
Uncle
I give up. You win, Mother Nature.
What am I supposed to do? 18 cm of snow, plus I don’t know how much ice yesterday. I could barely lift the shovel. I cleared a narrow path from the front door to the street, and that was that.
Driveway? Who gives a f***? The car can sit there, encased in ice, until May. I really do not care anymore.
Side door? It’s permanently closed. If I have to haul my garbage and recycling bin out the front door for the next 6 weeks, so be it. I did it this morning. This is the new normal.
I just read we could get 25 cm more on Saturday. I weep. I'm definitely buying some alcohol. It seems like the only answer now.
I give up. You win, Mother Nature.
What am I supposed to do? 18 cm of snow, plus I don’t know how much ice yesterday. I could barely lift the shovel. I cleared a narrow path from the front door to the street, and that was that.
Driveway? Who gives a f***? The car can sit there, encased in ice, until May. I really do not care anymore.
Side door? It’s permanently closed. If I have to haul my garbage and recycling bin out the front door for the next 6 weeks, so be it. I did it this morning. This is the new normal.
I just read we could get 25 cm more on Saturday. I weep. I'm definitely buying some alcohol. It seems like the only answer now.
Some people are crazy fanatics
I just bought tickets to see Springsteen at Giants Stadium in New Jersey on 31 July.
It was my sister's idea.
Her husband is also coming.
In September, they will have been married for 30 years; in November will be the 30th anniversary of us seeing Bruce for the first time. After 30 years of wedded bliss, Bro-in-law has finally accepted the fact that there have always been 3 people in their marriage: him, her and Bruce.
We'll go to Asbury Park too, and take pictures of the Jersey shore.
It was my sister's idea.
Her husband is also coming.
In September, they will have been married for 30 years; in November will be the 30th anniversary of us seeing Bruce for the first time. After 30 years of wedded bliss, Bro-in-law has finally accepted the fact that there have always been 3 people in their marriage: him, her and Bruce.
We'll go to Asbury Park too, and take pictures of the Jersey shore.
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
O: I'm hopping on the bandwagon
O does not = Oprah. Not this time.
It took all season but I've finally gotten into watching Alexander Ovechkin.
I suspect I'm a victim of some TSN Sportsnet conspiracy. Seems like every time I check there's another Capitals game on. So I watch. And I see Ovechkin score goals. Lots of goals. Lots of fun goals.
And now I look forward to Capitals' games. There's one on right now. Ovechkin scored again. Big Fun.
It took all season but I've finally gotten into watching Alexander Ovechkin.
I suspect I'm a victim of some TSN Sportsnet conspiracy. Seems like every time I check there's another Capitals game on. So I watch. And I see Ovechkin score goals. Lots of goals. Lots of fun goals.
And now I look forward to Capitals' games. There's one on right now. Ovechkin scored again. Big Fun.
Fun with a Finn
Way back on December 1, 2006, this humble blog reported on the romantic shenanigans of the Finnish Prime Minister.
To refresh your memory: HELSINKI, Finland (Reuters) -- Prime Minister Matti Vanhanen, dubbed Finland's sexiest man, broke up by text message with the girlfriend he had met on the Internet, she said in a magazine interview."Matti dumped me in a text message, where he said 'that's it,'" Susan Kuronen told the magazine Me Naiset (Us Women) in an interview published on Friday.
I still can’t get past the idea of the sexiest man in the country being the Prime Minister. If I try to think of Stephen Harper that way I get a migraine. Anyway…
There’s an update on naughty dumping-by-text-message Matti and it is quite juicy.
From the Times of London: The former lover of Finland’s Prime Minister was today cleared by a court of any wrongdoing for publishing a steamy kiss-and-tell memoir which revealed how he wooed her with baked potatoes and dumped her by text message.
(Editor’s Note: Wooed her with baked potatoes?….the mind boggles. )
The two lovebirds had many secret rendezvous and the book detailed the PM’s romantic side. “He kisses so passionately that the car windows were steamed up,” she wrote.
(Editor's Note: I’m still thinking Steve Harper here. Oh god.)
After having sex, the Prime Minister usually wanted beef and potatoes, she wrote. He especially liked them baked. “Once, when he kissed me, he said that I tasted better than oven-baked potato,” Miss Ruusunen wrote. “That was great.”
(Editor's Note: I’m speechless.)
To refresh your memory: HELSINKI, Finland (Reuters) -- Prime Minister Matti Vanhanen, dubbed Finland's sexiest man, broke up by text message with the girlfriend he had met on the Internet, she said in a magazine interview."Matti dumped me in a text message, where he said 'that's it,'" Susan Kuronen told the magazine Me Naiset (Us Women) in an interview published on Friday.
I still can’t get past the idea of the sexiest man in the country being the Prime Minister. If I try to think of Stephen Harper that way I get a migraine. Anyway…
There’s an update on naughty dumping-by-text-message Matti and it is quite juicy.
From the Times of London: The former lover of Finland’s Prime Minister was today cleared by a court of any wrongdoing for publishing a steamy kiss-and-tell memoir which revealed how he wooed her with baked potatoes and dumped her by text message.
(Editor’s Note: Wooed her with baked potatoes?….the mind boggles. )
The two lovebirds had many secret rendezvous and the book detailed the PM’s romantic side. “He kisses so passionately that the car windows were steamed up,” she wrote.
(Editor's Note: I’m still thinking Steve Harper here. Oh god.)
After having sex, the Prime Minister usually wanted beef and potatoes, she wrote. He especially liked them baked. “Once, when he kissed me, he said that I tasted better than oven-baked potato,” Miss Ruusunen wrote. “That was great.”
(Editor's Note: I’m speechless.)
More about winter
From The Gazette: The total snowfall in Montreal this season, measured from Sept. 1, is 296 centimetres. The record set in 1970-71 is 383 centimetres.
And we're getting another 20 cm today.
1970-71 was the Cal Ripken of winters.
We cannot possibly match that record. Can we? Please God no.
And we're getting another 20 cm today.
1970-71 was the Cal Ripken of winters.
We cannot possibly match that record. Can we? Please God no.
Ever Notice?
how when you slip and fall on the ice, time comes to a standstill?
I had my first fall of the season about half an hour ago. Stupid effing black ice.
It was weird how slowly I slid to the ground. I didn't think that I had hurt myself at all (well, there's the pride thing) but now my left hip is starting to throb a bit.
I love winter! It is the bestest!
I had my first fall of the season about half an hour ago. Stupid effing black ice.
It was weird how slowly I slid to the ground. I didn't think that I had hurt myself at all (well, there's the pride thing) but now my left hip is starting to throb a bit.
I love winter! It is the bestest!
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
Hic
The NY Times has an article today about drinking, and how around this time of year people want to get pissed. To get out of the winter rut, I suppose.
Anyway, I didn't really learn anything from this except that it quotes a 1969 research book entitled "Drunken Comportent".
Great name for a book.
Anyway, I didn't really learn anything from this except that it quotes a 1969 research book entitled "Drunken Comportent".
Great name for a book.
15 to 30
I feel like I'm doing hard time.
Environment Canada sez another 15 to 30 cm of snow are coming tonight and tomorrow. With a few ice pellets thrown on top.
Let us take a moment now to stop and visual Mr. and Mrs. Anonymous, and the two little Anonymi, currently sunning themselves on a Florida beach*.
How I hate them.
(*Well maybe not Mr. Anonymous. He's hiding under an umbrella and a blanket, going "Ack! Are you out of your mind? I'm not going in the sun!")
Environment Canada sez another 15 to 30 cm of snow are coming tonight and tomorrow. With a few ice pellets thrown on top.
Let us take a moment now to stop and visual Mr. and Mrs. Anonymous, and the two little Anonymi, currently sunning themselves on a Florida beach*.
How I hate them.
(*Well maybe not Mr. Anonymous. He's hiding under an umbrella and a blanket, going "Ack! Are you out of your mind? I'm not going in the sun!")
Monday, March 03, 2008
Le Big Boss
Max is mighty! He's the mightiest.
And what can I say about Bruce? I've seen him 9 times over 30 years. That's more than I've seen some of my relatives. No wonder my sister says we talk about him like he's a member of the family.
Night is an awesome opener.
During The Promised Land, I got goosebumps. I could feel the little hairs on my arms standing up.
The man is joyful. His obvious glee kept building and building. By the time he got to the encores he was exuberant. Grinning, laughing, strutting, bubbling. Born to Run sounded so fresh. It sounded like he still loves singing it after, what, 32 years? 33?
In the afternoon, my sis had said "I just want to hear Jungleland". So when the piano started tinkling, her eyes went wide, and she looked at me and asked: "Is it? Is it?" I said: "Yes, it is". That was worth the price of admission. She was so happy.
We were on our feet for over 2 hours. When I got home, I had to take Motrin 'cause my legs were aching. Imagine how he feels.
And what can I say about Bruce? I've seen him 9 times over 30 years. That's more than I've seen some of my relatives. No wonder my sister says we talk about him like he's a member of the family.
Night is an awesome opener.
During The Promised Land, I got goosebumps. I could feel the little hairs on my arms standing up.
The man is joyful. His obvious glee kept building and building. By the time he got to the encores he was exuberant. Grinning, laughing, strutting, bubbling. Born to Run sounded so fresh. It sounded like he still loves singing it after, what, 32 years? 33?
In the afternoon, my sis had said "I just want to hear Jungleland". So when the piano started tinkling, her eyes went wide, and she looked at me and asked: "Is it? Is it?" I said: "Yes, it is". That was worth the price of admission. She was so happy.
We were on our feet for over 2 hours. When I got home, I had to take Motrin 'cause my legs were aching. Imagine how he feels.
Saturday, March 01, 2008
Yes, of course
Bruce Springsteen appears in Montreal tomorrow night.
and
Henry Rollins appears in Montreal tomorrow night.
Life is a big cosmic joke at my expense. sigh.
By the way, I'm totally miffed at all the spam that keeps showing up in the comments lately. Grrrrrr.
and
Henry Rollins appears in Montreal tomorrow night.
Life is a big cosmic joke at my expense. sigh.
By the way, I'm totally miffed at all the spam that keeps showing up in the comments lately. Grrrrrr.
We Go Green
From today's paper, edited to protect the guilty.
The [Nanukian workplace] headquarters in [Nanuk’s neighbhourhood] has landed the country's first Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design gold certification for an existing building (LEED-EB) from the U.S. Green Building Council.
The president and chairman of the board of the [Nanuk’s landlord] that manages and co-owns the [glorious] edifice, told dignitaries yesterday the award recognizes his firm's "commitment to taking a leadership position" as a property manager in regard to environmentally friendly buildings.
The [sacred] building was completed in 1996 according to strict requirements of the American council.
Challenges included different modifications in terms of lighting, plumbing, ventilation, responsible water use, recycling, maintenance processes and methods as well as operations.
"It makes economic, social and environmental sense," he said after unveiling the certification plaque in the building lobby. "It's also financially viable."
Right. I’m tempted to write to The Gazette and say, when you have to flush the toilet 4 times just to make the toilet paper go away, it’s not "responsible water use". We complain endlessly about the water pressure since they made all these changes. Urgh.
I saw the award ceremony and reception going on in the lobby when I left the building yesterday at lunch. Was I invited? No. Was hunky Al Gore there? No. So who cares?
The [Nanukian workplace] headquarters in [Nanuk’s neighbhourhood] has landed the country's first Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design gold certification for an existing building (LEED-EB) from the U.S. Green Building Council.
The president and chairman of the board of the [Nanuk’s landlord] that manages and co-owns the [glorious] edifice, told dignitaries yesterday the award recognizes his firm's "commitment to taking a leadership position" as a property manager in regard to environmentally friendly buildings.
The [sacred] building was completed in 1996 according to strict requirements of the American council.
Challenges included different modifications in terms of lighting, plumbing, ventilation, responsible water use, recycling, maintenance processes and methods as well as operations.
"It makes economic, social and environmental sense," he said after unveiling the certification plaque in the building lobby. "It's also financially viable."
Right. I’m tempted to write to The Gazette and say, when you have to flush the toilet 4 times just to make the toilet paper go away, it’s not "responsible water use". We complain endlessly about the water pressure since they made all these changes. Urgh.
I saw the award ceremony and reception going on in the lobby when I left the building yesterday at lunch. Was I invited? No. Was hunky Al Gore there? No. So who cares?
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