Help, help! We're being seduced

“I don't think I've ever been accused of seducing anyone, even my wife." – Stephen Harper.

Forget about seducing just one person, Harper is in province-wide seduction mode, wooing Quebec in full Casanova gear. And, gulp, we are falling for him.

Ontario is in a snit, jealous of all the attention Quebec is getting. It’s fun to upset Ontario. Who doesn’t like to upset Ontario?

I have to hand it to Steve-o, he knows us. He knows that there is nothing Quebec likes more than to be given more attention than every other province and promised yummy treats. We feel we deserve it because…well, I don’t know why exactly, but we have that pouty-face culture of entitlement and if Ottawa doesn’t give us our roses and chocolates, we cry and stamp our feet and threaten to run home to mother.

I know he needs Quebec to form a majority govt next time, but what’s he really up to? Surely we’re going to be told to wrap a sheet around our trashy selves and hit the highway the day after we succumb and vote him in, aren’t we? He’ll act like we never have met.

I hate admitting I think he’s smart, but I admit it: I think he’s smart. And lucky. Taking advantage of the current political situation here is smart. Having an ally in the Quebec Premier, Charest the frizzy weasel? I mean how lucky can Stevie get. How rare is it to have a) a Quebec premier who wants to deal and b) a weak PQ leader who is getting no respect from the saps who have quickly realized there’s no “there” there. Suddenly everybody’s meeting at the bistro (smoking while they are still allowed to) and thinking “these Conservatives, they are not so bad.”

The planets are aligned for Steve Wonder.