Chip Time! with your host JAW Fan

Despite my packing on the pounds, the cold snowy weekend that passed made me realize that I better store up on extra body fat, just in case I get snowbound and am unable to hit the grocery store for days. So, off to the dépanneur I stopped for some crunchy chip comfort...but into the Twilight Zone did step.

That's it, folks, I officially throw in the towel (hopefully pulled off the body of some hot hunk in a locker room)...I am stunned, truly confused (much like Anson Williams at a MENSA meeting.) What could possibly have thrown me for such a loop?...Yes, you guessed it --- the Powers-Who-Be-Who-Assign-Names-To-Chip-Flavours.

Innocently, I purchased Pringles Extreme Blazin' BBQ. Can anything be more clear and concise, I thought. Well, needless to say they weren't "blazing"...but get this...they didn't even taste like BBQ. Any pre-conceived notion you might have of a BBQ chip, just throw it out the window. Call 'em Tandoori BBQ or call 'em Piri BBQ or call 'em Asian Spice BBQ...but they're all still rather BBQ-ish in nature. Well, these weren't. They were tangy and tart, and I thought to myself whilst gorging on them that they had a familiar taste...And then it dawned on me. They taste like Vinegar chips...hot n' spicy vinegar chips...Yes, you may all now pull a Moe..."Waaaahhhh"...I mean, at this point the chip corporations might as well not waste money on packaging, design, and marketing. Just sell your chips in a plain white bag with black lettering that reads "Mystery Flavour"...Have we gotten to the point where buying a bag of potato chips has now become a Kafka-esque experience? Am I but a cockroach in the chip fcatory of life? Has the whole world gone mad? Will Valerie Harper ever return to TV? Jesus Christ or Zsa Zsa, please do something!

Of course, now that I have vented, let me say this...hot 'n spicy vinegar...wow!...f * *king brilliant. Bold, fresh, innovative, tongue-teasing, nipple-arousing are just a few of the words to describe these long-tinned identically-shaped saline snacks. Bravo! Huzzah! and Hallelujah, Honey! These suckers might have had the wang-o-meter in a twist at first...but once it settled down, it registered a whoppin' bed-hoppin' 8.5 inches for these wickedly-sneaky tricky treats. Praise you, Mr. Pringles, and your magnificent moustache.