I must thank my good friends at eHarmony for rejecting me because in so doing they have launched me on a summer project that I believe will provide a veritable goldmine of blogging material. I speak, of course, of internet dating.
I found another site to join. I filled out their questionnaire, and they accepted me. And, apparently they think I’m wonderful. To protect the innocent I’ll call it Anti-EHarmony (AEH) for now.
I hardly know where to begin. (Oh, my boss is on vacation for the next 3 weeks, which is great for blogging reasons and for Asian movie festival attendance reasons as well.)
First things first. Guys are stupid.
I want to speak to any woman who would be seriously interested in meeting a guy who uses either of these two words in his on-site nickname: “horny” or “licker”. Really, fellas. I’m going to spend one click of the mouse finding out about a guy nicknamed JoeHorny? That is pathetic.
Actually, thinking about it now, it would probably be great fun to check out what he had to say. Or very, very disturbing.
For research purposes I’ll have to decide whether to investigate this doofus, knowing that everyone can check out who has been checking their profile. And when, and how often. That’s fair, I believe, in this game. That means no stalking without the person’s knowledge. And there is a “block” function that can be used to stop someone from accessing your profile if they are creeping you out. Seems safe enough.
Pathetico No. 2. If you are a middle-aged very, very average looking guy, how much luck do you think you’re going to have when the first line of your profile says: I’m looking to have sex with two women at once. My advice: hire two hookers. There’s no other way, pal. And his name wasn’t even JoeHorny. Gotta give the guy credit for honesty, I suppose. He’s not wasting anyone’s time and I’m certainly not going to waste his.
6 comments:
sounds like the sex and the city episode where stanford meets a guy on-line called BigTool4You
Far be it from me to criticize anyone who uses whatever means possible to find romance (internet, bars, public washrooms)...however, you might be off to a bad start when you get accepted and then immediately proceed to state "guys are stupid" I know there are many men out there who are sadly lacking in social and/or dating skills (just check out the Fantasia line-ups), but may I propose the following (as a last ditch effort, of course)...try one of these said "loser boys" They would be greatful and delirious to have female companionship. As a result, you get to be the boss, you get them to wash the dishes, you get to decide when to do the wild thing, you get to decide everything...of course, downside, you have to put up with pre-mature ejaculation and Star Trek conventions. Hey, you can't have it all!
JAW fan
I did see a profile where the guy has posed in Star Wars costumes, and he wasn't a teenager. sigh.
Again, I'm grateful to anybody who comes right out and says this is the kind of person I am.
forget the internet, chat some people up in line at the festival. A few impersonations of chow yun fat (sp?) and some clever steven chow humor...oh what success you'll find! =)))
Chow Yun Fat impersonation? This would involve sliding down the bannister in the Hall building while shooting off two guns at the same time? Could be tricky. I could never be that cool.
I saw a profile once of a guy posing in his Star Trek uniform surrounded by the several PC's he seemed to be so proud of owning. While I'm partial to a bit of sci-fi myself, I'd never think of wearing any of the costumes.....
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