Don’t touch the coffee pot in your hotel room

Anyone know what a lota is? Neither did I until a couple of weeks ago.

A lota is a watering can-type device that South Asian people use to clean their backsides. Everyone who knows me, knows I am fascinated by all things toilet-related (and that’s why I so love the Japanese!), and naturally the lota is now a subject of interest to me.

South Asians don’t use toilet paper. They wash up with water. And the one South Asian that I know, ahem, thinks that Western people are unclean for using toilet paper to wipe. Yeah, yeah, says I, me and my dirty bum. I do see the point, though. You wash every other part of your body with water, so why use dry paper in your delicate area? Water works best. I’m talkin’ like a convert, now.

I’m not really sure how it works, but lotas come in all sizes and shapes. And, if away from home, in a pinch, South Asian people will just carry water bottles or Coke bottles filled with water with them to the toilet. One of the weirder things I have seen on the Internet is the infamous coffee pot on the floor of your hotel room.

If you are in a hotel room, and spot a coffee pot on the bathroom floor next to the toilet, chances are your room was used by a South Asian, and they used the coffee pot as a makeshift lota. So, um, don’t take any chances. Go to Tim Horton’s. The lota/coffee pot doesn’t actually touch the person’s behind, but frankly, even if it doesn’t, you don’t wanna be touchin’ that thing. And ya know what? Even if the coffee pot is safely in the coffee maker, I still wouldn’t touch it. Maybe the maid just took it off the floor and stuck it back in its proper place. You really don’t know where that thing has been. I repeat: Go to Tim’s.

I love multiculturalism.