JAW Fan called me today to tell me about a self-help book that Mr. G. Smith, a friend of his (I'm using the term "friend" oh so loosely here) wants to write. It's called Shake Up or Break Up. Here's the theory behind the book.
A) After many years of marriage women lose interest in sex,
therefore
B) Men should be allowed to go outside the marriage for sex.
While I could not quite see how he could stretch this out into a 150-page book, I agreed with the theory. Which seemed to confuse JAW Fan. Being female, my agreement with the above theory came with a number of "qualifiers".
I thought I could write this book. For copyright infringement reasons, I would call my version Shake It Up or Break It up. (Clever, eh?)
Here is my revised synopsis.
A) After many years of marriage [some men and] women lose interest in sex [with their spouses],
therefore
B) Men [and women who mutally agree that this is an acceptable way to save their marriage for the sake of the kids] should be allowed to go outside the marriage for sex [with their spouse's knowledge and consent].
I really should've gone into contract law.
I suspect that Mr. Smith would be horrified to see his pithy thesis statement transformed into this unwieldy condition-laden minefield. But that there's the difference between men like Mr. Smith and someone like me.
This being said, I can't help but think that Mr. Smith's in-your-face book would be a much better seller than my little publication.
7 comments:
maybe mr g should advise those men on ways to spice themselves up for their wives
That would never enter his mind. Ever.
I agree with cityofmushrooms on this one - how typical of a man to not try and solve the problem but just look elsewhere - elsewhere usually being a blonde half his age.
I did read a serious article about a study that said women lose interest in sex once they feel the relationship is going OK - kids, house, whatever. Which is probably about the time he starts looking elsewhere!
I can agree with La Nanuk's revised theory; however, Mr. G.'s theory was that he have his funsies without telling the wife.
I have no scientific data to back this up, but the reason women (and, yes, sometimes men) lose interest in sex is because couples do not invest enough energy in keeping it fresh, making it different, spicing it up so to speak...even if that means having to swing a little or introduce a third person into the bed on that occassional evening (as I have known people to do).
The big problem behind all of this is that people do not talk about sex, they don't tell people what they like, what they don't like, what arouses them, what they want to do, etc...and when your partner does talk, people should listen, respect, and try to accommodate.*
Personally, in my relationship, I am a sexual dictator: "do this! do that! go here!" I'm surprised I haven't been beheaded yet!
JAW fan
*unless that something is really icky!
I also agree with rattanisfan, I think living with someone can be a relationship killer (even if that relationship is purely a friendship/roommate thing) I am sure La Nanuk would agree(Shreddie in a plant pot...that's all I have to say!)
I have also never lived with or have any intention of ever living with anyone. I guess that's what keeps my relationship a happy one. We see each other only on weekends...If I could only get him to like Godzilla movies, life would be perfect!
JAW fan
JAW, when did you become Mr. Relationship Counsellor? I suspect that since you are home early enough to catch Dr. Phil, you are cribbing his notes.
Wait till you hear my advice on child-rearing...
JAW fan
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